Should we try changing?

I am going to touch upon a controversial topic today, and I would love to know your personal views about this topic. 

We all have heard this age-old axiom, “when in love, love the person for who she/he is, don’t try to change her/him”.

Well, I don’t fully agree with this. Yes, in the truest essence you have to accept a person without any prejudice or judgment, but if the change is for good, why not? Let me take an example. You fell in love with a person, head over heels. You have stayed long enough to realize it is not an infatuation anymore. While being together, you see certain behavior which you know is detrimental to the person’s well-being. Won’t you put an effort to work with her/him to change it? And if you do, will that qualify you as a bad actor?

I strongly believe two people come together because they see an emotional quotient getting addressed, but two people stay when they adjust their outlook a bit to make it meaningful for each other. As they say, “change is the only constant.”

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20 thoughts on “Should we try changing?”

  1. I think loving them for who they are is important. Of course if you love someone you will try to help them change for the better. Still, you can’t help someone who doesn’t want to change themselves. I like the point you raise here. 🙏

    Liked by 1 person

  2. In a committed relationship, the one who needs to change must do the changing, not at the partner’s insistence or collaboration. The partner certainly has a right to set boundaries for themselves but they can’t expect the person to change because they feel it’s necessary. One either accepts the other for who they are and if they can’t, they should leave. I know that sounds rather harsh but after 27 years with the same person, it’s a lesson we’ve learned.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Great to know your point of view. I agree, no one can impose a change, but if the change is for good, I believe, an effort should be made. Thanks for reading and commenting. Always great to see you here


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